Yes, I know - the term "organisator" doesn't exist yet - but it bloody well should do. I'm trying to avoid using the terms "Professional Organizer" (usually spelt the American way) or worse "Life Coach" to set up a niche /neesh/ service, unique to me. I want there to be only one "organisator" in the world - ME!
Okay, you've probably guessed I'm going to be selling myself on here. Why here? Well, for starters, I can't afford a website yet, PLUS I can't be bothered to set up another blog. I'm not lazy just busy, too busy to brush my teeth even. I now hear you ask, "how can you be an organisator if your time management skills suck?". They don't, I'm just in the unique position of dealing with an eccentric 5 year-old, controlling a diabetic's blood glucose, coping with a messy soon-to-be-ex husband, divorcing, buying a flat, buying things to put in the flat and stuffing 2 penguins for a taxidermy exhibition in Mogadishu, Somalia, later on in the year.
YES, I want to be your personal organisator! I want to form your socks into roses, I want to dust your bookshelves and sort books by type, colour, alphabetically by author or sell them for you on Amazon/ebay and even index them for you on a spreadsheet. My area of expertise is "tins" - here I can damp-dust them for you, throw out old and dented ones, organise them by type (fishy/meaty and so on), arrange them so they are visual and grabbable and most importantly, have their labels facing forwards. I can research cheap meals using said tins to use up said tins so that you can buy more said tins.
Why should I be your PERSONAL organisator? Well, here are some of my tips to PERSUADE you:
Top Tips To Be a Professional Organisator:
No shredder? I tend to tear up some stuff (I have to say some stuff for security reasons) into tiny pieces and put them in a baby's dirty nappy (in a nappy sack) - no-one's going to rummage about in there, trying to steal your identity. If you don't have a baby, I seriously recommend you get one.
Give all soft toys to charity - kids don't like them and they collect fleas... except Beanie Babies, which are worth something.
When buying furniture and other household items think "skinny and tall" rather that "fat and squat", I even like my cutlery skinny and ergonomic, even better, chopsticks.
Get rid of your children's old, broken and useless toys while they are at school. If you do it when they're at home, even an 8 year old will want to play with their old chewy rattle. Likewise with your kids' artwork like sculptures made out of plastic bottles and cereal packets, they've GOT TO GO, so smash 'n' bin them.
Don't live with a hoarder.
Dealing with piles of paperwork, do this left hand test: Pick up piece of paper with your left hand, glance quickly at it then look away. How does it make you feel? Good or bad? If "bad" deal with it straightaway and postpone the "good" for another day :)
As you can probably work out, I've got many tips and a tankload of advice for getting losers and not-so losers "organisated". My initial fee is FREE as I'm just starting out and want feedback more than anything, so if you're near me in terms of location GET IN TOUCH!
Comments welcome.
I could use an organisator..
ReplyDeleteI know someone who doesn't ever get rid of anything. They poo in plastic bags and these bags now reach the ceiling on their first floor. They also horde urine in plastic bottles and these are stacked up too.
ReplyDeleteThis person is quite wealthy and is in need of your expert help and advice.
Would you be willing to help someone like this?